Best ways for falling asleep

Best Ways for Falling Asleep

As you know I have fibromyalgia which means my sleep quality is not good enough for my body’s needs.  I have to take medication which is supposed to help with that.  I don’t have a problem getting to sleep but I do have a problem that if I wake during the night I find it hard getting back to sleep.  So I am going to share with you some of the best ways for falling asleep for me and if it works for you that is fantastic.

Concentrate on your Big Toe

Yes, you read right to concentrate on your big toe.  I know how ridiculous that sounds but it works.  All you need to do is lie comfortably instead, take several deep breaths then start to think about your big toe.  

Think about how it feels, is it hot? is it cold? What can you feel touching your big toe? Then feel your toe relax and feel heavy.  Then you concentrate on your next toe; do this with each toe and then start on the other foot starting with the big toe again.

After the toes concentrate on the top of each foot and then move to the bottom of your feet.  Move to your ankles, calves, thighs, hips, tummy, waist, chest, fingers, hands, wrists, arms, shoulders, lower back, upper back, neck, face, eyes, head.  I can assure you that if you do this slowly and properly you will not get to the end of this.

Meditations for well-being


Chakra Colour Meditation

Now if like me you have a good imagination this is a great one and there are some variations on it I will suggest too.  This can be done at night time before you go to sleep or during the day as a way of meditation or emptying and soothe a busy mind.

Get yourself into a comfortable position.  Imagine you are sat next to a big old oak tree.  You are sitting at the base of the tree, your back against the tree, your legs cross and hands comfortably resting on your legs.  

First of all, you are going to ground yourself and this is with the root chakra which is at the base of your spine, the bottom of your body.  Imagine the red root chakra connecting you to the earth grounding you to mother earth.  Imagine your chakra as a Catherine wheel of red light, use your imagination to spin the red Catherine wheel clockwise, get it spinning freely, sometimes it can take a while if you are new to this and also if there is a spiritual blockage.  As soon as you get that red Catherine wheel spinning move to the next chakra the sacral chakra.  

The Sacral chakra is a catherine wheel of Orange colour and orange sparks, using your imagination get the orange wheel spinning get it in time with the red previous wheel.  Get them both spinning freely together.  

Next move to the solar plexus chakra, a Catherine wheel of bright yellow light. Get this yellow wheel spinning clockwise in tune with the previous two.  

When it is ready move to the heart chakra, this is predominately green but can have pink intermingled too.  Get this Catherine wheel of green spinning imagine seeing some pink every now and then.  Get it spinning alongside the others, get them all spinning together.  

Now it is time to move to the throat chakra, this is a beautiful sky blue, the area of communication, get this wheel spinning as fast as the others, get them going in unison then move to the third eye chakra.  

The third eye chakra is between your eyebrows, the area of intuition, psychic ability, spirituality, creativity and inspiration.  This chakra is a beautiful amethyst purple, get that wheel spinning, make sure it is spinning in tune with the others.  Get them spinning all at the same speed.

Finally, the crown chakra is going to start spinning.  At the very top is the crown chakra, get that spinning, imagine the golden white light spinning and in time with the others.

Stay like this and now concentrate on your breathing and the colours spinning together.

Now it is time to close the chakras otherwise your energy will deplete.  Start with the root chakra, the red bottom Catherine wheel.  Imagine it slowing down, slower and slower until it eventually disappears.  This chakra has now been recharged and closed.  

Move onto the sacral chakra and imagine slowing down that orange spinning wheel of light until it fades away.  Do this with the remaining yellow light of the solar plexus, the green light of the heart, the blue light of the throat, the purple light of the third eye and finally finish with the crown chakra.  Imagine it slowing down until it disappears.  Your chakras are now safely closed and you are full of healing light.

You have now completed this meditation.  Sometimes some wheels are more difficult to spin than others which is completely normal it just means you have a bit of a blockage going on.  But just keep at it and imagine it starting slowly you will soon get it spinning the same as the others once cleared.

Rainbow Shower Meditation and Chakra Cleanse for the end of the day

If you are doing this to sleep then get comfortable in bed otherwise if it is a meditation get yourself into a comfortable position that is best for you.  

First of all, I like to start by imagining I am standing in a shower, it’s a beautiful shower, the nicest one you have ever seen.  Imagine now that your body from top to bottom is covered in a dark horrible dust which is the negative debris from the day.  The water in this shower is the exact right temperature for you.  How good is this going to feel? After a rubbish day, you have been craving this.  

Now stand in the shower cubicle and turn the dial.  Close your eyes and feel the warm water fall on your head and every part of your body.  Now imagine this lovely clean warm water is washing away all the dirt of the day.  You can see it running off, you can see the dirty water running down the plug hole until it runs clear.  As soon as every bit of negativity and debris has been washed away it is time for the beautiful rainbow coloured water.

The colour of the water is going to match and connect with your chakras within your body, cleaning and refreshing and recharging them.  The water that comes out first is for the root chakra.  The root chakra keeps you grounded and it is red, the most beautiful red you have ever seen, the colour of rubies.  

It washes over you completely, when you feel it needs to change it will change automatically to orange, for the Sacral chakra, this represents taste and is your reproduction area, the orange water is warm, deep and bright you can see it wash over you completely.  


When it is the right time it will change to yellow which is the solar plexus, your gut, this is the area where you get those feelings, your gut instinct.  You see and feel the bright yellow water being sprayed all over your and your body soaking in the yellow water.  

Next is the time for the heart chakra, this is green with some pink every now and then, imagine this fresh green and soothing pink rush over you.

Run your hands through your hair feel this healing water over your face.  Now it turns blue, for the throat chakra, the communication area.  Feel the beautiful azure blue water flowing over you healing the area of communication.  It’s getting rid of any blockages with regards to communication.  

When you are ready the water will turn purple.   This is clearing your third eye chakra which is the area of intuition, vision, psychic abilities, connection to wisdom.  It motivates inspiration and creativity; it is situated between your eyebrows.  Feel this purple water, the colour of amethyst pouring from your head and running all over you.  

Finally, the water will turn golden, directing its healing to your crown chakra.  Now feel this warm golden colour running all over you until it slowly starts to turn from water into a light.  

You are now being showered by pure golden light, it is covering your body.  This beautiful light is surrounding you.  Breathe in the golden light and let it fill every part of your body. Again breathe in the golden light and let the outgoing breath take the internal debris of the day away from you.  Once again breathe in again, breathe in the pure golden light and fill your body.  Every single little bit.  Breathe out any internal remaining debris of the day; keep doing this until the outgoing breath is the same colour as the gold you are breathing in.  You are now fully cleansed spiritually and at peace both internally and externally.

Banishing Negative Thoughts

If you are too tired or feel like you have had a bad day get yourself into a comfortable position.  Close your eye and imagine sitting crossed legs on a beach, in a meadow, somewhere special to you.  Imagine the sights, smells, temperatures, use all your senses, breathe in and out several times.  Imagine breathing in healing white light and breathing out any negative light.  

When you feel ready imagine looking up to see a large white cloud.  Now imagine transferring all the negative things from the day transferring to this white cloud.  Get that cloud as dark as you can with anything you didn’t like about the day.  

When you feel you have filled that cloud you can start to imagine it floating away.  It is very slowly it’s moving away from you.  As you watch this cloud move you can feel the negative feelings disappearing from your body.  Keep watching the cloud get smaller and smaller.  It gets that small you can’t even see it anymore.  It’s gone.  Completely gone.  

Concentrate on your breathing once again.  Fill your body with the golden light.  When you are ready slowly open your eyes and have a glass of water.

I hope that you find these helpful.  The power of the mind on you spiritually and physically is amazing.   Practice these on a regular basis and hopefully, you will notice a difference.  I hope these are some of the best ways for falling asleep and a peaceful mind.

Once again the weekend is upon us.  I hope you are all going to be enjoying your weekend and doing something that makes you feel good.  

My love and thoughts to you all

Tracey xXx

Tracey Ward


Amazing things that I love and make me smile

100 Amazing things that I love and make me smile

I woke up this morning and told myself I am going to write a list of 100 amazing things that I love and make me smile; some not as amazing at others but still things that I like.  When I have a bad I can look at them and change my mindset a lot easier.  

My List

  1. My dog being happy to see me when I wake up in the morning; not sure about his tongue in my ear though
  2. That first cup of coffee in the morning, and the second and the third…
  3. Looking outside to see a beautiful azure blue sky, can’t beat it
  4. Looking at the beautiful big tree outside my house which I can see from both my bedroom and my living room even without my glasses
  5. Checking the news headlines on my phone to see what is going on in the world – I’m nosey
  6. Having a good stretch when you wake up and before you go to bed
  7. Listening to the birds singing
  8. Butterflies are just beautiful and remind me of new starts and transformations
  9. Feeding the ducks at the local reservoir – I swear they sound like they are laughing
  10. Driving with the roof down and feeling the wind in my hair
  11. Listening to some of my favourite music
  12. Singing – badly… especially to Kate Bush!
  13. Coming downstairs first thing and there are no dirty pots because you did them the night before – 
  14. Listening to the wind in the trees it’s like people whispering
  15. Rainbows – I always feel as if I am on the right path in life when I see a rainbow
  16. New make up – doesn’t happen as often as I like however
  17. A soak in the bath surrounded by candles – which are lit obviously
  18. Art
  19. A good film is always a good thing
  20. Favourite sweets – depends on my mood but currently enjoying Cadburys chocolate eclairs
  21. Empty roads –  love driving when the roads are empty, hate stopping and starting all the time
  22. Museums – I could spend hours in museums
  23. The coast at any time of year
  24. My dog “Harvey Houdini” playing with his favourite toy
  25. My Children obviously and also my adorable 2yr old grandson
  26. Mash, pie, peas and gravy
  27. Apple and blackberry crumble
  28. A good book
  29. Crossing things off a list
  30. Bembridge, Isle of Wight
  31. Osborne House, Isle of Wight
  32. Train journey through the countryside
  33. Kittens
  34. Big cats
  35. Meditating
  36. A rose that actually smells the way it should do
  37. Flowers particularly peonies
  38. Hotel Chocolat
  39. Walking through a forest and spotting a deer
  40. Building a sandcastle
  41. Celebrating your inner child
  42. Making my own candles
  43. A babbling brook
  44. Barefoot on a beach
  45. Barefoot on grass
  46. Freshly cut grass
  47. Freshly made bread
  48. Cheerios with very cold milk
  49. My bed
  50. Power nap (that’s like a normal one but you wear a cape)
  51. Getting a new book
  52. Log or coal fires
  53. A facial – my daughter is fantastic at this
  54. A cuddle – just need to find someone to cuddle now
  55. PJ days
  56. Knitting a new scarf – it’s quite meditative
  57. Writing
  58. Finding something fab in a charity shop
  59. Mindfulness
  60. Make jewellery something repetitive like kumihimo, macrame, etc
  61. Pink Lady apples
  62. Polymer clay
  63. Wandering around Waterstones
  64. Thunderstorms
  65. Betty’s Macaroons
  66. Baked beans with a twist
  67. Freshly squeezed orange juice
  68. Taking my bra off
  69. Getting my PJ’s on and fluffy socks
  70. Dairylea cheese
  71. Horses- I have always wanted to learn to ride and have my own.
  72. Fresh Snow
  73. New hair cut
  74. Do something to make someone’s day
  75. Buy someone a gift out of the blue
  76. Write a letter
  77. Eat out
  78. Turn off your phone and TV
  79. Clean sheets on the bed
  80. Look at old photos
  81. Go outside and feel the sun on my face
  82. Laughing so much it hurts and you make stupid noises
  83. Put some music on and dance
  84. New stationery, I love getting new notebooks and pens
  85. Opening a new jar of coffee and popping the seal
  86. Popping bubble wrap
  87. Starting a new jar of marmalade
  88. Finding money you forgot you had is always amazing
  89. Snuggled up on the sofa
  90. The clean feeling you have after having a shower and washed your hair
  91. Malteasers that have been kept in the fridge then melting in my mouth
  92. A really good massage with aromatherapy oils
  93. Waking up before the alarm goes off and you find you have more time to sleep
  94. Baking a cake
  95. Kicking autumn leaves
  96. Buying a new magazine
  97. That feeling you get when you undo your jeans because you’ve eaten too much
  98. This is going to sound gross but it feels great and that is cleaning your ears with a cotton bud after you have had a shower and washed your hair
  99. Singing in the car
  100. Smell of Lavender essential oil
    100 amazing things that I love and make me smile
    Cup Cakes by Tracey Ward

    I actually quite enjoyed making that list of 100 amazing things that I love and make me smile and very glad that I have done it.  Think I actually smiled all the way through that.  

    So what would you have on your list?… why don’t you let me know and leave a comment.

    Enjoy the rest of your day and will be back very soon.

    Tracey xXx

Beans on Toast

Beans on Toast

Just a little extra post for today.  As I’ve not been feeling well past few days and my lack of sleep has caught up with me I went for simple but gorgeous comfort food tonight.  Baked Beans on Toast but not as you think, mine has a little twist.


Branston Baked Beans x 1 can
Wholemeal Bread x 2 slices
Fresh parsley x chopped handful or to taste (I like lots)
Parmesan Cheese x freshly grated
Freshly ground black pepper 


Now I know you are not stupid but I can guarantee if I don’t write the method someone will ask me.  

So open the can of beans (I much prefer Branston than Heinz) put in a microwavable container and cook according to your microwave instructions, mine is 3 minutes as I like mine really hot.  

While the beans are cooking toast two rounds of wholemeal bread.  

While all this is cooking chop up some fresh parsley, I used flat leaf but you can use curly too.  I have about a small handful but I love parsley.  They are your beans so have as much or as little as you like.

By this time everything should be ready so butter your toast (proper butter sorry none of that pretend rubbish), mix the fresh parsley into your beans and pour over your toast.  

All that is left to do then is to season with freshly ground black pepper and lots of freshly grated parmesan.

That’s it how easy is that.  I promise once you try them like this you won’t want to go back.


beans on toast comfort food
Beans on Toast Tracey’s way

Why don’t you leave a comment about the way you like to eat yours.

Bon Apatite 

Tracey xXx

Things that failed relationships teach you

Things that failed relationships teach you

You really shouldn’t think of failed relationships as being a waste of time, love and effort on your part.  Relationships end and there isn’t much you can do about it.  If it is meant to end it shall do.  There is always something to learn about yourself and relationships when once comes to an end.  I am going to share with you some things that failed relationships teach you.

Let us begin

  • Sex is one hell of a drug – apparently.  I can just about vaguely remember this activity.  Some people say it is like riding a bike; well I hope not because I used to keep falling off mine.  But seriously with the right person, it is a heady cocktail and it keeps you healthy.  Those hormones that are released are necessary for well being and keeping the bond alive with intimacy.  You also get to learn techniques along the way.
  • Insecurities will eat you alive – I’m not joking either definitely one of the things that failed relationships teach you.  Being in the wrong relationship or having the wrong mind set will make you ill.  Are you insecure about your physical appearance?  I know what this feels like especially after being pregnant three times.  For those of you who have not experienced this yet, imagine blowing up a balloon three times and then look at it afterwards… the men I date don’t seem to understand this.  Unlike celebrities, most of us women can not afford to have tummy tucks after each child.   Insecurities come about too when you do not trust your partner which leads to the next bullet point.  
  • Trust takes time to build but can break in an instant – One of my ex-partners who I loved more than anyone betrayed me, he spoke to women online behind my back in a sexual nature, visited them too on occasion and when I found out it broke my heart, I didn’t believe in that saying until it actually happened to me.  It wasn’t just an emotional pain it was a physical pain too.  I wasn’t able to trust him afterwards and that made me insecure for a very long time.
  • Communication – You need to be able to open up to your partner or what is the point.  You should be able to talk about anything and everything without fear of being judged or ridiculed.  You in return must have the ability to listen I mean really listen.  It won’t last long if you can’t talk to the person you are supposed to be in love with or listen to them either.
  • Strengths – Vulnerability is a strength. I feel vulnerable every time I meet someone new and I have to stop building that wall around me that I have built up.  I have to acknowledge the feeling of vulnerability to be ready to accept what could be something truly wonderful.  You need to put yourself in their hands and trust with all your being.
  • Love – Love is not just a feeling it is a choice, it is also real as real as you and me.  Peoples capacity of love differ greatly, my ex I mentioned above had placed far too many conditions on it and rarely made me feel the love that I craved.    The love I have spoken of before on my blog.  It has to be unconditional there is no question of that.  You can’t love someone just because they do a certain thing for you or you expect them too.  We have to love completely and utterly with no conditions and expectations.  I agree sometimes that is scary but anything else is a lie.
  • Don’t settle for going for someone you can grow with – You need to know what you want from life and a partner I think before you start that journey.  I loved my husband when I got married but I got married far too young; early 20’s and I changed, I also suffered from undiagnosed post natal depression which was the final nail in the coffin I think.  But we remain friends and always will be.  My point is that you think you will grow together but more often than not you will grow apart.
  • Trust your gut – now this is something I have been very guilty of ignoring until now that is.  I used to ignore it.  It would be screaming at me, telling me no he’s a psycho… me “oh don’t be daft stupid gut I’m sure he has a nice side” – well guess what he didn’t, and neither did the next or the next.  I learnt my lesson the hard way but it was a lesson well learnt and  I now listen to my gut and it fails me no longer.  I’ve learned to listen to that little voice in my head, and the feelings in my gut which people refer to as your second brain.  They speak the truth.  A psychic medium once said to me, “you’d love a serial killer because he has nice hands” he wasn’t far wrong.   A case of not seeing the wood for the trees.  Open your eyes, feel and listen.
  • Treat your relationship as a priority – this goes without question well you would think so wouldn’t you.  My ex had a priority and that was his X Box until 3 am or 4 am every morning, followed by talking to other women online.  I’m not repeating all this because I am bitter because I am far from it I am just using them as examples.  If you want your relationship to work you have to put it first.  It is something that you have to work for, and there will always be a level of compromise but that is a small price to pay.
  • Don’t chase someone – apart from making you look like a desperate numpty if you need to chase someone they are not the one for you.  If you are important to someone they will show it and vice versa.  No game playing, and don’t mess with someone’s feelings giving them hope where there is none.
  • Getting hurt makes you stronger – I do believe this to be true and I used to be such a bloody doormat. I gave people far too many chances always believing that in my heart they are really good people and capable of changing.  Well were they buggery.  I think we do build up a protective wall for a while, but when you have digested it all and you realise it wasn’t your fault or it just wasn’t meant to be, you change the way you view it and start to realise just what it is you do and don’t want from being in a relationship.  
  • Accept them for who they are – I’ve kind of already touched on this a little bit when referring to unconditional love.  They were a certain way when you met them so don’t expect them to be different or change three months down the line.  Respect their values and the things that are important to them and make them who they are.  You have no right to make or expect them to change.
  • We are all individuals – this goes without saying.  We are all unique and so we should be.  It’s great if you have joint hobbies but it’s great if you have ones just you like too.  You are not two peas in a pod, you are not joined at the hip.  Although if that’s how you want to be as a couple that is fine too.  I think what I am trying to say is don’t expect your partner to conform to your idea of what they should be.  Let them be themselves.
  • Love can be dangerous – yes it can but so can crossing the road with your eyes closed.  I think you just need to keep a bit of common sense around you in the early stages.  If someone seems controlling they usually are and you will find out nine months in when you end up with a black eye that your gut was telling you about and to reverse and quickly.  
  • We all make mistakes – Don’t we just.  All kinds of mistakes some over and over until you learn the lesson.  I have made tonnes of the bloody things, mistake after mistake and I also think this sits along nicely with communication.  I think if we communicate better there will be fewer mistakes.  It’s not rocket science really is it?  We are human beings or as I say spiritual beings in human bodies.  We are here to learn lessons and graduate to university (heaven for want of a better word).  So yes you can make your mistakes; that doesn’t mean I’m giving you permission to go around making them left right and centre. Just appreciate we are all human and forgiveness goes a long way to healing someone and also yourself.
  • The perfect person doesn’t exist – well apart from me that is – JOKE  Sorry I couldn’t resist that.  But not one of us is perfect but it seems that a lot of people need to be reminded of this.  I get chatting to men on dating sites. As soon as they find out that I’m not a size 12 and that I’m overweight or curvy as I like to be referred they disappear.  The thing is weight can be gained and it also can be lost.  However arrogance and fickleness I find quite an ugly trait and sadly usually stay with someone.  I have no special kind of person I go for.  The most important thing for me is a sense of humour, kindness, caring, compassion, empathy, gentleness and loving.  Romantic is also a plus together with a great smile.  You can not be all things to all people and dont be so quick to judge.  The only person who can judge you is you no one else.    None of us knows what experience of life the other person has had.

    Well, there you go just a few things that failed relationships teach you.

I’m, sure there are more and if you want to share them please do.

Always good to hear other peoples points of view.

Until next time

Love as always

things that failed relationships teach you

Tracey xXx



Motivational Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Today I am posting a summary of all the motivational quotes and inspirational quotes that I have posted on Instagram this last month.  

motivational quotes
You’ve got it
motivational quotes
Keep on track
motivational quotes
Follow your dreams
motivational quotes
Listen to your heart
motivational quotes
Stay true to yourself
motivational quotes
Start Now
motivational quotes
Be Happy
motivational quotes
You are unique
motivational quotes
Walk the road you were meant to
motivational quotes
The power is within
motivational quotes
It’s your choice
motivational quotes
The choice is yours
motivational quotes
Just Believe
motivational quotes
Don’t give up
motivational quotes
You are amazing
motivational quotes
Change your life
motivational quotes
Thoughts are things
motivational quotes
You can’t pour from an empty cup
motivational quotes
Go for it
motivational quotes
You are beautiful
motivational quotes
One life so live it
motivational quotes
Life is an adventure
motivational quotes
It’s good to be different

I do find reading these kinds of things gives me a bit of a kick up the backside that I need.  Sometimes you just get caught up in the day to day life and we just need to stop and be still for a short while remind ourselves of what we are actually capable of.

I am going to be doing some creative visualisation exercises this weekend so next week I’ll let you know how it went.

Another weekend is upon us.  Hope you all have a fantastic weekend whatever you are doing.

Tracey xXx

Empty Nest Syndrome

Empty Nest Syndrome

Well it finally happened had my dose of empty nest syndrome, my middle child has left home to spread his wings.  Came sooner than I was expecting; yesterday in fact.  Just hit me like a bolt of lightning.  

Empty Nest Syndrome -It really exists

It’s funny I thought empty nest syndrome was for WI members and people that like knitting and borrowing CDs from libraries (I don’t get out much).    But no because it just happened to little old me.  


Empty nest syndrome you can fuck off right now.  I was absolutely devastated, felt empty, worthless, useless, alone, lonely and I’ll be honest I cried myself to sleep.  I was beside myself something and someone important was missing from my life.  My middle baby boy has grown up.  He is starting at University soon and it’s time for me to let go.  The pain of letting go of a child into the outside world is a physical and emotional pain.  I knew it was coming but even so, the pain of it hit me like a sledgehammer last night.


It wasn’t because I was alone yesterday I spend a lot of time on my own and I honestly don’t mind my own company.  I’ve never been one for socialising every minute of the day.  But this was a different alone, an empty alone, a kind of who am I now kind of alone.  I was numb.


As I previously mentioned last night was a severe case of the empty nest syndrome and this morning I won’t lie I had another little cry but then told myself stop! enough tears now Wardy… This is my job as a Mother.  I carried him in my belly for 9 months, brought him up teaching him right from wrong, we had a little bit of a blip with that one along the way but he pulled himself out of it and made me a very proud mother and he still does.  He’s finished his A’Levels.  He has found himself a beautiful, friendly, caring, intelligent, artistic girl who I would be honoured to have as a daughter in law.  It’s time for him to live his life.  He is taking that next step and I am so unbelievably proud of him; I don’t think he realises how much.


When I finally started to get my head around it this morning I realised the empty nest syndrome is actually a positive thing.  It means I have done my job to the best of my ability and so far for 24 years.  I know I am not perfect by a long shot in fact but then who is?  

Who am I?

Now it is time to find out who I am.  I mean who am I?  If I don’t know you certainly don’t.  Yes, my name is Tracey, I was born in Leicester, I now live in North Yorkshire, I studied art and design and University but that isn’t me.  It isn’t who I am.  I now have that opportunity to find that out and find my purpose in life, my service to humanity, my passions and my desires, I’m at a crossroads and I am now going to, at the same time as my son, take a leap of faith and embrace the future.  


The one word that fills my soul now is “HOPE“.   A hope for a future not just for me but for everyone.  Hope is such a strong emotion and a powerful word and thought.   It is the one thing that people have when  they find themselves in dark places, or situations, with no idea or knowledge of any escape from it.   Hope is the light at the end of the tunnel.  You keep your eye on that light and move closer and closer to it following your soul’s path whatever that may be.  


I know my future is going to be important and on many levels.  I know that setting up Harrogate Black Dog two years ago was the right thing to do, I know that writing poetry was the right thing to do, I know that writing a book was the right thing to do and I know writing this blog is the right thing for me to do.  My future is the written word and it is going to take me on a journey of discovery and of helping others along the way.  

I can now actually look back and see that everything that has happened in my life was for a reason, they were all stepping stones to take me to this very point in my life.   I know with every ounce of my being I am doing the right thing.  

Light Bulb Moment

I think what I want to say is to any other mothers out there going through the empty nest syndrome, you know what, give yourself a bloody good pat on the back.  Being a parent is one of the most difficult jobs in this world but also one of the most rewarding.  Your babies are now going out into the big wide world and will succeed because of you.  

Your Turn

This is your turn to find out what makes you tick again, for you to get that fire back in your belly.  Start new hobbies, interests or get back in touch with some old ones.

We have been given a life to live and that is what we must do.  Because you know what… when you stop… and pause.. just for a minute.. look around you.. take it all in.. life can be magical.  Life “is” magical.

Right, I’m just going to feed my unicorn and go for a gallop; you can join me if you like ;).

Love you all

Tracey xXx

empty nest syndrome
I give you my love by Tracey Ward


What is Love?

Come on seriously what is love?  You can’t explain it very easily you just feel it. You decide that others love you in different ways and they feel the same or not about you.   What a mixed up bag of emotions.  Peoples capacity of love and to love are so different and so complex when in reality it should be the easiest thing in the world.

What is Love?

what is love?
Embrace your inner child

Come on seriously what is love?  You can’t explain it very easily you just feel it. You decide that others love you in different ways and they feel the same or not about you.   What a mixed up bag of emotions.  Peoples capacity of love and to love are so different and so complex when in reality it should be the easiest thing in the world.

Love should be unconditional

You should never put conditions on it but we do- we all do.  For example, I will love you if you treat me in this way, I will love you if take me to work every morning.  You think to yourself, oh he will love me if I give him a blow job once a week, he will love me if I look like a page 3 model.  What the fuck are we doing to ourselves that is not love.  You are letting others judge you based on what exactly?    

Your first breath

what is love?
Baby Grandson, my daughter and me – proud Grandma

Love is unconditional.  We should never ever place conditions on it.  There is only one time in your life when you have ever been loved unconditionally and you have loved unconditionally and this is the day you were born.

You came into this world when no one knew you and you knew no one.  Your parents looked at you and loved you unconditionally right at that moment you were truly loved unconditionally and you as a baby loved your parents unconditionally.  It’s only as we start to grow and start to get judged by people that we start to change.  

We try to make others happy, or happier or make them feel like the best thing since sliced bread because you expect something in return for it… well don’t!.  You do it because you want to do it with no expectations.  Well, you know what they did start out as being the best thing since sliced bread because of there being no conditions expected or placed.

Other Peoples Opinions

And something else do you know what other people think of you is actually none of your damned business because for one they don’t know you and secondly that’s their personal thoughts, not yours.  I have spent so much of my life worrying about what other people think of me… what the fuck was I thinking?  I must have been off my rocker.  Who taught me to become that person?  While doing that I was denying myself life… a voice… to be part of creation.  I’ve wasted 48 years of trying to please people who either don’t care about me, don’t love me and don’t actually really know me.  What a waste of precious time.

The World Is Your Oyster

Who would I be right now if I had started off with the right mentality?  The world is my oyster and you know what it is yours too.  The person who is stopping that is yourself.  You can’t blame the person you live with, the habits you have formed.  Thoughts are actually real things and they create actions and reactions which create movement but it’s up to you which direction they take you.

Like Attracts Like

You think negatively you will attract negativity it’s as simple as that.   Imagine yourself as a magnet, and you want to attract positive things into your life the only way you are going to do that is by thinking about positive things.

My Life

I know I am not going to be spending the next 48 years worrying about what other people think of me.  If I want to have another tattoo I’m going to have another tattoo, if I want to dye my hair pink I shall do, I will wear what I want and because I feel good in it and that’s all that matters.    People will always judge regardless so fuck em.. do it anyway… please yourself… love yourself… be proud of who you are, the journey you’ve travelled, the things you’ve accomplished.  Life is so incredibly short.  What is love to you?

Do I Believe In God?

Someone asked me the other day if I believed in God.  Well, I don’t believe in the god that society expects us to believe in but I do believe there is something that is difficult to put into words.  We are all energy and energy does not and can not disappear it just turns into something else.  I believe this world is nothing but a series of lessons we have to learn before we graduate to the higher realm whatever or wherever that may be.  God is basically about creation, and we are here to create… to live and to experience.    We are spiritual beings in a human body having human experiences then we will go back to being a spiritual being on another higher plane.  


Wouldnt you want to look back on your life and have pride in what you have accomplished, and in the unconditional love and the help that you gave to others.    Again I mean what is love? Shouldn’t we just start trying to love people for who they are… don’t judge others; you don’t have that right… don’t put people down…. what gives you the right?    Every single one of you is unique… we are not sheep.. 


Shouldn’t we just start trying to love people for who they are… don’t judge others; you don’t have that right… don’t put people down…. what gives you the right?    Every single one of you is unique… we are not sheep..   You need to find that inner glow and let it shine.  We all need to shine.  So let’s shine together.

These are my beliefs and what my soul believes.  I think that was the journey I had to take to get to this point in my life, it had to take me 48 years to learn that lesson.    The next chapter is going to be a fulfilling one on a physical, emotional, practical, and spiritual level.  I have new friends to make, a partner in crime to find, laughter to fill my belly, new experiences, hobbies, adventures, new sensations, new everything.  

I am going to start my journey with a plan.  An actual physical plan where I picked up a pen and write down what I am going to do, where I am going and how I am going to get there.  I am also going to start meditating again followed by some stretching exercises.  You have to start with self-love as a wise person once said, you can not pour from an empty cup.  

Talking of wise people I want you to look up on Bob Proctor, and maybe read one of his books.  All about changing your mind set and attracting positive things into your life.  I don’t get any money for referring you to his site or anything I just think he is an amazing person to learn from.

So I can do it I’m sure you can too…

High five Wardy… 

Tracey xXx



Reopening of a Tattoo Shop

Reopening of a Tattoo Shop

Today I am writing on behalf of a very very good friend of mine.  His name is Lee and he is a tattooist and also a very talented artist and this article is about the re-opening of a tattoo shop; in fact his tattoo shop.

Down but not out

I won’t go into too much detail because it is personal to Lee, but Lee had set up his shop earlier in the year and due to an extreme and unprecedented series of personal events he recently had to close it.   But Lee who I can assure you is a survivor and not a victim has thankfully decided to kick the bad shit in the ass and get on with his life and doing what he does best… Tattooing…. and…. art!


Now he has until the 16th August to get clients booked in so he can keep the shop up and running, and I have promised him I would help as much as I can.  Hence today’s blog post.   The premises are in Ripon, North Yorkshire, a beautiful market town not far from Harrogate, Leeds and York.  This is a perfect location for the reopening of a tattoo shop.


Now what is needed right now is clients old and new.  As I mentioned Lee needs a client list before the 16th and bookings in.  I believe Lee is offering a discount for the first few clients so the earlier you get booked in the better.   Please contact me on this blog or by my facebook page and I will pass the information on to Lee on your behalf.

Examples of Tattoos by Lee

reopening of a tattoo shop
Butterfly by Lee Devor
eye tattoo by Lee Devor
Eye Tattoo by Lee Devor
rose tattoo by Lee Devor
Rose Tattoo by Lee Devor
tattoo by lee devor
Tattoo by Lee Devor
lion tattoo by lee devor
Lion Tattoo by Lee Devor
cover up tattoo by Lee Devor
Cover Up Tattoo by Lee Devor
Lion Tattoo by Lee Devor
Lion Tattoo by Lee Devor

Impressive work don’t you think?

Art Work

morgan freeman in pastel by Lee Devor
Morgan Freeman in pastel by Lee Devor
pastel artwork by Lee Devor
Pastel Artwork by Lee Devor
old man in Pastel by Lee Devor
Old Man in Pastel by Lee Devor

I do believe that Lee has several pastel pieces for sale and I will either be adding them to my shop or posting the link to Lee.  I will let you know after seeing him.

Please do the following

I would be so so very grateful if you could share this post, like this post and even comment on this post.   

We need to get Lee back up and running doing what he does best.

Tracey xXx

Another Disastrous Date

Another Disastrous Date

Because my last post about a disastrous date was so popular I thought I’d write about another disastrous date.

Mr Small

Now then Mr Small as you can guess was small he was called that for two reasons, but I’m only going to talk about one of them.  I’m 5’3 and I guess he was only one inch taller which isn’t a problem; I’ve dated small men before.  

First Date

I met this guy at a cafe on the way to York.  Initially, I thought for his age he wasn’t bad looking;  I think he was about 10 years older than me and we seemed to get on ok, in fact well enough to meet for a second time and actually a third time.  

Second Date

Now the second date was a meal at his house made by him.  I was quite impressed that he wanted to cook me a meal.  I think we had chips and ribs or something very similar to that.  So, dinner was served and I took my place at the table, picked up my knife and fork and started to eat.  No problem at all with the food but when I looked up Mr Small was eating like a pig, he did not use his cutlery but he was using his hands.  Bearing in mind this is the second date so you should really be making a bit more of an effort.  But this guy was really chowing down, his head was about 3 inches above the plate and he was just shovelling it in.  

Third date

I mean this should have put me off, but because he seemed really nice I thought I’d give him another chance.  So, the third date came.  We went for a drink at a pub.   He picked me up and we had a few drinks.  The evening was pleasant enough and the night came to an end and he kindly dropped me off at home.  

However, before I got out the car he leant in for a kiss, it was going really well until for some bizarre reason, mid snog, he put one of his fingers into my ear and started wiggling it really fast.   I kid you not!  

Yep another disastrous date

What the fuck is that all about?  I mean really!  Has anyone else ever experienced this ear wiggling thing?  Is it some kind of secret fetish I don’t know about?   All I can say is it didn’t do anything for me… 

another disastrous date
Give us a kiss but leave my ear alone


Competition Time

Competition Time

As you may have guessed it is competition time.  The first of many I hope. The competition will be run on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter and via this blog page.  

The winner will receive

The winner will receive a free signed paperback copy of my book “Why Rainbows May Cry”.  This is a collection of poems by myself.  It is about my dating experiences good and bad over the past couple of years.  Please be aware that several poems do contain swear words.

why rainbows may cry poetry book
Why Rainbows May Cry by Tracey Ward

Ways to Enter


To enter on Instagram please go to my Instagram account, like the competition post, leave a comment and tag a friend who you think would also like to enter.


To enter on Twitter please go to my Twitter account. Like, follow, and retweet with the hashtag TraceyWardMe


To enter on Facebook please go to my Facebook account.  Like the post and page, share, leave a comment and tag someone who you think would like to enter.


To enter via this blog please leave a comment and subscribe.

The competition will end on 1 September 2017.  Good luck to everyone that enters.

And so, we have come to another Friday, is it me or is time flying by this year.  This past week, in particular, seems to have gone very quickly.  Anyway enough of my ramblings.  Everyone have a fantastic weekend and speak again soon.

Tracey xXx


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